Homeschooling

I have meant to write something on our so-far short homeschooling journey. Now I'll make a stab at just that!

I'm not sure why I haven't given serious consideration to the homeschool thing before this, because I have always hated to have to give up my kids to the schools when they are so little, and each year feel like I'm missing out on so much in their lives when they are gone to school for so long each day. They have been a bit timid in school, but anyway have seemed to like to go, for the most part. One has some 'mild' sensory integration issues, and I could see school was a stress in this area (he didn't stress about it, but it was a challenge in some ways), one had selective mutism, so couldn't talk in school the first couple years. Selective mutism is a childhood anxiety issue, which usually shows up when a child starts going to school, or maybe in preschool, since many kids go to preschool.

Maybe I never gave serious thought to homeschooling since things went fine in school, and I thought I would pull them and homeschool if it ever seemed there was a need to do so.

So the economy gave us the boot from America back to Finland, and it was a pretty sudden decision to come here. When one school year in Mn ended, we had no clue we'd be moving before the next school year started. And by mid-August our kids were starting school in a small Finnish country school. From the beginning we had negative reaction from the main school office, as they told A, when he went to enroll them, that they are not excited about having our kids in the school since they don't know much Finnish. It was stressful to bring the kids there, a couple weeks after school had started, and feeling for them as they were not only new students, but foreigners who didn't know the language well. But for the most part it seemed they got along well there.

Small things came up. N's teacher is also the principal in the school, and she was quite determined that N will learn Finnish in a hurry (that's not so bad) and late in the fall she asked permission to ask for help from the school counselor because N was no longer talking at all in school, except on the playground he was with his siblings. She told me she realized too late that when after a few weeks of N being in school she tried to insist  on him using Finn instead of English (he had been speaking English with her and some of the students, tho' quite reservedly.) And then he quit talking at all. And he also started to have a hard time falling asleep at night. And that got worse and worse. I ended up getting him some melatonin, because this was really an issue. He was thinking and worrying too much. The kids were basically given everything in Finnish (tho' I was informed later that they have the right to have a certain number of hours a week of their lessons in their mother tongue, so should have had some things presented to them in English.)

Anyway .... I'm getting sidetracked here on last school year. Yes, we saw much anxiety and anger in our kids - and now that they are homeschooling we are realizing really how hard last school year was.

So then as we realized we will not be moving back to America (economy is not improved there, and so much work for A here) and asked about renting the home we were in longer, we realized that they will be selling the house (I understand that on their part) - we had a big process of finding another rental. Took a couple months, and the biggest stress for the kids was starting in yet another new school. We tried to find a rental that would work for us in an area that had an English school, but no luck there. So when we found a place and I was trying to deal with the kids anxiety over switching schools, it dawned on me that I should check into  the possibility of homeschooling. Did a bit of research, and then asked the kids if that would make the move easier, if I would school them at home. Right away the tension was relieved alot.

I planned first to homeschool the oldest two, thinking the next two would benefit from the public school still. But our 7 year old begged me to be able to homeschool too. Then I realized that this would be his third year of school, and third school. So I promised him he could. And M did not want to be going off to school alone, so I kept all four home. Discussed with the superintendent ?? and she gave me rare privileges and said I can totally decide what to teach and how to teach it. Homeschooling is very rare in Finland (only about 300 homeschooled children) and the school district usually requires some quite close ties with the local school.

Next was to decide what type of program and what style of teaching we should use. Lots of hours of thought and research, and I decided on one online program that is possible to use internationally and is not very expensive. Along with that, of course, is lots of Mom involvement. But overall, we've been pretty impressed with the program we use online.

So how is it going on the homeschooling front? The best part is to see how our kids are like totally different kids than who we were dealing with last school year. Of course they have their days and moments - we deal with fights, with ears deaf to Mom's lovely voice tones (heh!), I think a couple of them would like more 'friend time', etc., but for the most part they are much happier, more cooperative, more confident, more settled. And the changes started showing right from the beginning of the homeschooling. And, the boys are now talking Finn. All three of the school boys refused to speak any Finnish. It was so bad for a while, they wouldn't even say some basic words that we have always used in Finn (makkara, for example.) The oldest one took the longest to come around, in all ways. Change is hard for him (poor kid has had many changes) and he cried the first couple nights in the new home. But we talked lots with him, and with all the kids - and he came around. But probably the most refreshing thing, and most reassuring to me, was when about a month ago he started to laugh again. And horse around with the little boys. And tell me little stories about what has been happening in his day. He was also the last one to start talking Finn.

As I pondered this school year, and tried to pick out my main objectives with this homeschooling year, I thought that of course I want them to learn academically. But most importantly I want them to relax enough to be able to start speaking Finnish (accomplished!), to rebuild their confidence (I see improvements!), and I want to just enjoy having them around (I usually do! :-) ) I have many things I need to improve on, myself. I need to be more organized, so I know what I would like the kids to accomplish each day. I want to be more organized about my whole day, so I don't take it out on the kids when I feel like I have only run circles all day. Etc.

One day I asked the younger two of the homeschooling four (ages 7 and 8) if it seems like they have learned anything, if they think of how it is in a typical school year in the 'regular' school. And both of them right away said, 'More!' That was a surprise! Several days later I asked our oldest boy the same question, and he also answered (after a moment) with the same answer. So I asked him how does it seem that way, and he said that in school they go over a new topic or idea so quickly, it's often hard to catch on. But at home (mostly with the online program we use, Time4Learning) he can take time to understand the new topic as it's being taught. So fun to hear! I haven't yet asked the second oldest what his thought is. I could mention many more things on the homeschooling topic, but ... this is plenty long already. Maybe more later!

Lately I'm seeing some of the anxiety and anger in the second oldest, but perhaps because he is accompanying me on a trip to America soon. I can't wait to heap loving attention on him the whole trip!